good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
accomplished twins. life is a go
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Randomize
