Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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