I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
