My nipple is on Facebook.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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