What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
