Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
