wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize
