u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Randomize
