real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize