Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
