Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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