Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize