He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
