I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize