One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
