At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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