there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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