I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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