Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
