You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
