Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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