How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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