She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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