are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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