I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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