with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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