cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
My pussy is not your playground.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
