she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize