we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize