Buhtt sex?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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