ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
