he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
please don't ironically join a cult
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