O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
