so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
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You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize