no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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