maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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