He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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