I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
