You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
