She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Just took my morning after pill in the library
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
