nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Randomize
