Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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