I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
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