I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
