Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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