6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
