i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
