I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
