That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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