is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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