Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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