Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
